Sands Publications and Resources Within this section you will find details of all Sands publications and resources for bereaved families and the professionals caring for them. The Sands range of support leaflets, booklets and books is aimed at parents whose baby has died, and their family and friends. Sands also have books written by health professionals about the grief following a baby's death and how people have coped, as well as resources written for health professionals who are caring for bereaved parents and families, with comprehensive guidance on good practise. Derby Sands have a small library of books many of which have been donated by grateful parents. These are available for parents to borrow and can be logged out for as long as needed. Use the Contact form here or telephone 07864 984523. Support and Information Leaflets When your baby dies your emotions and experiences may be different from your partner's, and the experience is different again for other family members. Sands have booklets and leaflets with information and support especially for mothers, fathers, children, grandparents and other family members and friends.  The booklets and leaflets listed below  can be ordered  by clicking on this link to the online shop. Booklets Support For You When Your Baby Dies: This booklet outlines describes the range of support Sands can offer when a baby dies during pregnancy or after birth. This leaflet is written primarily for parents in the hours and days after their baby's death. The information will also be helpful to anyone affected by the death of a baby, those that care for them and anyone that wants to find out about the services Sands offer. Saying Goodbye to Your Baby: This booklet for parents was first published by Sands in the 1980s. It has now been updated and re-written, drawing on the experiences and insights of parents who have themselves lost one or more babies. The booklet covers everything that newly bereaved parents are likely to find useful in the first few days and in the longer term, and deals both with emotions and with practical matters. Family members, friends and health professionals will also find this booklet useful in understanding parents' experiences and the issues that are likely to be important to them. Footprints: Our national newsletter published 3 times a year and contains a wide range of news and articles on Sands, including a section dedicated to the personal experiences of bereaved parents and their families. Leaflets About the other Children: explains how children may perceive the loss of their baby sibling and gives advice about what you can do to help them cope. Mainly for Fathers: gives information and support for recently bereaved fathers. For Family and Friends - How you can help explains common reactions of bereaved parents and how you can help them in their time of grief. The Loss of your Grandchild: written specifically for the bereaved grandparents. Sexual Problems Following a Stillbirth acknowledges this sensitive area following the death of a baby. The Next Pregnancy: Guidance for Parents covers topics such as how soon to try again after your loss, being pregnant and when your new baby arrives. Books to read Fathers and mothers whose own baby has died have written about their experiences in a range of books for Sands, describing their changing emotions and the impact their baby's death has had on their lives. We have illustrated story books for children written by parents who wanted to find ways to talk about their baby's death with the other children in their family. "At times you feel that you could drown in your grief, and that nobody understand the hurt inside, but reading other people's experiences shows that you are not alone and lets you know that your thoughts and feelings are perfectly normal." All our books listed below are available to buy from the Sands Shop Books written by parents: Jo by Caroline Youde: Bang! The whole world changes around you because of a series of events. This is the personal account of the pain and grief suffered by Caroline Youde on the loss of her son Jo. Not only did she lose her son but her ability to have more children. More >> Born Asleep: is my personal account of the unexplained stillbirth of my daughter Amy at 39 weeks gestation in April, 2002.  She was my second child. Losing my precious baby in this way was a deeply traumatic and profoundly sad experience for me.  A life changing event that I knew I would need to document. More >> Finding Zoe: It was in January 2003, whilst visiting Australia, when Paula first heard of Zoe and Clive Gentle during a conversation with a mutual friend.  That was to be a conversation that once again changed her life.  On arrival back in England, Paula set out on the long and emotional journey to find out as much as she could about Zoe, a baby who had died over forty years before. More >> Books written by parents whose babies have died Where did I go wrong?: Is a personal account of the journey Sarah Speake has made since her daughter Amélie's unexpectedly early birth and subsequent death, a mere eleven days later.  Her experience has altered the core of who she is irrevocably, and made her re-assess her priorities. This book details the agonies of Amélie's life in intensive care, and the emotional roller- coaster Sarah and her husband Martin have had to endure since. More >> Alice: A Journey:  A new book added to the Sands range detailing the moving account of Alice's brief life and death after weeks of uncertainty, and her mother's healing journey.  "Lying shaking on the scanning table, I was told the baby inside me had a 50- 50 chance of survival. I was six months pregnant. Our baby would either live or die and we had no way of finding out."  More >> Living with Leo: Leo's father, Mario, has written movingly of his experience of prospective fatherhood and the distress of bereavement. Twelve letters written over a year, from a father to his son, tell the story of Mario's life with Leo: of the excitement and anticipation, the grief and loss, and perhaps most important of all, the emergence of strength and hope. More >> Fathers F eel Too: When Andrew Don's baby Lara Jean died at five months in the womb, the hospital consultant sent his wife a condolence letter which didn't mention him. Andrew felt like a non-person.  He writes, "Lara Jean was my baby, too. I'd read the books and seen the movie. I was prepared for fully-fledged fatherhood and had signed up for the full deal." More >> Soulmates: Blessed by little angels: January 5th 2001 was a day that will be stamped in my mind forever. For it was the day in which my dreams shattered into a million pieces at the devastating and unnecessary loss of my beautiful angel son Keiryn. Cheryl Peachey's deeply emotional roller-coaster journey after Kieryn's death took her to realms she never knew existed. More >> Thomas A Lifetime denied: Shelley Wilkinson wanted to tell the world about her wonderful son: how his death left her heartbroken but also how it has changed the course of her life. This book describes a mother's emotional journey to reconcile her anger and sadness at her baby's death, moving from denial, devastation, guilt, anger and to finally hope. More >> I Hate This - A play without the baby: David Hansen's one man play takes you from the moment his son was born and through the year that follows.... but not in that order.This is an honest, compelling and even humorous trip through one father's experience of stillbirth.  The script of this extraordinary play, which is touring the UK in June 2007, is now available. More >> A Candle for Lisa: Lisa Ruskin was born prematurely with serious heart defects. As her mother Debbie recovered consciousness from the emergency Caesarean Section, she was pressed to give consent to switch off Lisa's life support machine. She later learned that Lisa's organs had been retained by the hospital. More >> Books specifically for children Toby's Tiny Tot: Taken from the series, "Toby's Triumphs", a collection of charming takes about a young boy named Toby. Toby's Tiny Tot is the sensitive story of Toby's longing for a sibling. Through his eyes, we follow the painful path of loss and its consuming sadness. Beautifully illustrated a useful resource for families to help children understand about the death of their baby brother or sister. More >>  A Star for Bobby: This is a book which talks directly to young children, using language and illustrations they can understand, about the death of a brother or sister, explaining why sometimes these things happen and how this may be making them feel.  A Star for Bobby tells the story of a family of birds. One of the newly hatched birds Bobby, is sick and soon dies. Bobby is buried and his brother and sister, on going to bed that evening, look up at the night sky to see a star shining especially brightly, Bobby's star. More >> Other recommended books When a Baby Dies, The experience of late miscarriage, stillbirth and neonatal death: This sensitive informative book offers a lifeline to bereaved parents and their families and is essential reading for every professional who comes into contact with parents after the death of their baby. More>> After Your Baby Dies by Martine Brennan BA, Dip. Couns., Dip. Therapy Ireland. I hope that this e Book will help you a little. It has been difficult to write in many ways; difficult to know what to put in and what to leave out. You may find it difficult to read. If that happens I suggest you put it away for a week or a month and come back to it when the time is right for you. Books for health professionals Guidelines for professionals: Widely recognised as an essential benchmark for good practice when caring for parents who have a pregnancy loss, a stillbirth or the death of a baby at birth or shortly afterwards.  The 2007 edition builds on the foundations laid down in previous editions. It is based on research findings and on widespread discussions with a broad range of health professionals, bereaved parents and relevant voluntary organisations. More>> Leaflets Returning to work after the death of your baby This leaflet includes information for parents about maternity and paternity benefits and about parents’ rights to time off and sickness benefit. Returning to work can be an extremely anxious time and many bereaved parents feel vulnerable and anxious about telling colleagues what has happened, and are worried about how people are going to react. The leaflet suggests ways of handling situations such as this, and covers issues such as displaying photographs of your baby and the need for time off for anniversaries or emotionally challenging times such as Christmas. Information for Employers -  Helping a bereaved parent return to work This leaflet has been written to help employers who are faced with the difficult and sensitive task of dealing with a staff member whose baby has died. It provides detailed guidance to ensure employers are equipped to deal sensitively and knowledgeably with a member of staff who has been through such an unimaginable trauma. Charity registration number 299679